Is Children’s Church An Effective Ministry?

When asked what is most important to them in a new church, many parents will list a thriving children’s ministry as their top desire. They want their kids to learn about The Lord on their level, in their own space. The problem is, many children’s church programs these days aren’t just teaching kids about Jesus with clever analogies, cute songs, and words that they can understand (what is an Ebenezer, anyway?). With lights, costumes, dancing, loud music, snacks, prizes, and a better-than-Chick-fil-A play place, we’ve turned children’s church into a three ring circus. Sure, the Bible may be taught, but is a weekly performance really the best way to do that? No. It’s not. In fact, children’s church is not an effective ministry for a wandering generation.

How do I know? It’s simple – it’s not working. Over 60% of young adults are leaving the church (source). That means well over half of the kids in these programs don’t actually have their lives changed by the gospel. That is a staggering statistic, and it’s worth a look to see why it isn’t working.

Keep in mind, this is a broad summary of children’s church. There are certainly Spirit-filled children’s church programs that are effective in the lives of the kids and families involved. Sadly, that is not the majority. This is simply a call for us, as the American church, to do better.

1. Families were designed to worship together.

If you spend some time reading the Bible, you’ll notice that the children weren’t separated from the adults when Jesus was teaching. They were there; probably fidgeting and moving around, but present nonetheless. After all, who gave the disciples the 5 loaves and 2 fish? And when Holy Spirit came like a rushing wind at Pentecost, guess who else had been waiting in the upper room for days? The kids. 

God has designed families to draw near to Him together and to experience Him together. Is there a need for individual Bible studies/Sunday school classes? Yes. It is good for kids to interact with peers while learning the Word. This regularly takes place on Sundays before corporate worship or on Wednesday evenings. But corporate worship (or “big church” as many of us grew up calling it) is not a time to separate as a family, but instead to draw near to God and one another.

2. Kids need to be held to a higher standard.

“But Jesus said, ‘Leave the children alone, and do not forbid them to come to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'” – Matthew 19:14

The entire Kingdom of God Almighty belongs to our children, and we’re settling for teaching them songs to memorize the books of the Bible. They have the power to heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, and cast out demons (Matthew 10:8), and we’re content with doing a puppet show about being kind to the kid next to you on the bus.

There’s more for our kids – so much more. We need to hold them to a higher standard. They’re seeking more of God than the basic Bible stories. They’re not coming to church to be entertained or babysat; they’re coming to meet the Living God. So when a man is saved at the altar, when chains are broken from the addict, when the Spirit of God comes sweeping across the entire congregation, they need to be there – seeing it, experiencing it, and being changed by it.

3. Children’s church is designed to host people, not host the Presence of God.

My brother-in-law planted a church a while back. It was very active in the beginning, but began to dwindle in numbers after a while. And yet, God was still moving powerfully and people were still being touched and healed. He was speaking about this one day, and said that so many people were coming at first because he had designed it to host people. He had comfy seating and lots of snacks; it was a very casual environment. But was the Presence of God there? Not always. When he began to pray about how God wanted this church to operate, he saw that he needed to design it to host the Presence of God, and that alone would bring people. And it did, in time, but more importantly, it brought God’s Presence, and that’s what we really needed.

I can’t help but think the same is true of children’s church. We have designed it to host children, not the Presence of God. We take what children like outside of church, and we tweak it to fit God into it. 

That’s not how this works.

We can’t put all of our focus on getting kids to come, and not put that same amount of energy into inviting God to come. Without His Presence, it’s empty. It’s not changing lives, it’s not healing hurts, it’s not touching hearts. It’s just a fun event for kids to come to each week. But God wants more than that.

4. It inadvertently teaches kids that “big church” is boring.

By providing our kids with an entertaining alternative to “big church”, are we inadvertently teaching them that corporate worship is boring? Is that why a large majority of teenagers and young adults are leaving the church? Because they aged out of the fun, and no one ever taught them how important the gathering of the saints truly is? 

Maybe it’s not; maybe it’s just all a big coincidence. But I think you and I both know that’s not true.

We need to show our kids, by our actions and example, that corporate worship is important. It is a time to fellowship with other believers, to praise God through worship, to draw near to Him in prayer, and to be equipped through the teaching of His Word. It may not be fun, entertaining, or “lit” (is that still a cool word?), but it is vital to our growth as Christians.

So is children’s church an effective ministry? Maybe, or maybe not. But I do know this: children’s church is not the answer. Daily discipleship, prioritizing corporate worship, and setting an example of faith is the answer for raising our children up in the admonition of the Lord. They follow our actions, not just our words. Let’s bring them along with us and show them the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

Note: at the time of this writing, I have 3 kids under the age of 5. I recognize how hard it is to keep young children in “big church”. That being said, hard is not the same thing as bad. If you would like additional tips on how to keep your children in church with you, here is a guest post I wrote for Called to Mothering on that topic.

How do you feel about children’s church? Does it fall short for you and your kids or do you feel like it is successful in your church?